Apiphobia's the name, COMPLETE AND UTTER TERROR is the game.

I'm sitting at my desk, aka our breakfast room table, and having a quick snack break.  I thought I'd drop in and apologize for a grave error I have made in my life.

I have never believed in phobias.

I always sort of thought that phobias were simply had by people who just really don't have much to 'em.  You know... hypochondriacs, silly geese, and the like. And you know what?

I was so wrong.


Why the sudden change of heart, you ask?  Because I've quite literally, no joke, developed a phobia.

Of BEES.

The little buggers, or any other stinger-bug like wasps and yellow jackets, scare the jeepers out of me.  If one gets near me (and, several people have noted they actually follow me around) I flip out.  I. Must. Run.

Mom always calmly tells me to stand still, and they won't bother me... but to no avail.  Something triggers in me and I must flee the scene, which turns into me looking like an idiot in front of whoever's watching.  My heart pounds wildly, and I dance around trying to make sure it doesn't. touch. me.  If I see one land on a person, I step back and feel the need to warn them, though I try to be calm.  I lose control of my body and it generally just takes off in the opposite direction of said stinger-creature.  My mouth goes dry, I shake, and at times, I've been known to squeal.  RF thinks it's funny, because it kind of is.  After the fact, I realize what a silly goose I am.  But all the while, while I convince myself it's irrational, my eyes are wide open.  Looking for bees.

So, in a nutshell, I'm a weirdo.

Thank you.  Have a bee-free day.

The Boulevard of Broken... Ancient Structures?

I'm a bad person.

This blog thing.  Well.  I'm not very great at it, apparently.  I just am far too slow.  But, I've finally sat down with some time to write!

Let's start with Saturday.  Pancakes.  My book.  Pajamas.  A nap... at 12 pm.  Because of said pancakes.

That pretty much sums it up.  You may be wondering "Why art thou so impossibly lazy?"  Well!  Be not disheartened!  I wasn't the only one.  Mom and I both rested, while dad did some studying.  But our excuse explanation is that we wanted to be well rested for Sunday.

"Why," you ask, "Would one rest to be well rested on Sunday which is the day of rest?"

This particular Sunday, dear readers, was not restful.  I woke at 6 (I'M SORRY, WHAT?) and then showered, put on jeans, a t-shirt, and tennis shoes.  This does not sound like the Caroline you know, does it?  I know.  It even surprised me.

Moving on, we left to take the Subway to Piramide (named, aptly, for the large pyramid outside of the station) and met other people from my dad's college.  My buddy, RF, waved a chocolate croissant in my face as I sipped my dainty cappucino, and then we set off.

We set off.  On a twelve mile walk.

I was fresh as a daisy for the first while.  We saw some really cool things!  Firstly, we saw the walls of Rome.  They were crumbly and broken, yet somehow still magnificent.  We saw an aqueduct, and the numbers for how much water those provided to Rome a DAY are mind-blowing.  Some million gallons or so.  It's truly unbelievable. Now, my explanations are going to be a little stunted because I seriously couldn't hear a thing the tour guide said.  (And I still can't find my camera cord, so go here for pictures.  It's my mom's Rome blog.)

We went to San Giovanni in Laterano, one of the most famous churches in Italy.  It was unbelievably gorgeous on the inside, and I think that that beauty is something that churches today really miss.  Amazing churches are a lost art, and it's quite sad.

We saw a set of steps, Scala Santa, inside a little building.  It is said that Jesus walked these stairs on the way to be judged by Pontius Pilate.  Now, though they are marble, they are covered by wood because mere mortals are not allowed to walk on the sacred steps.  The faithful Catholics climb these stairs, and only do so on their knees.  It seems rather moralistic to me, and I don't believe that we should literally worship the ground that Jesus walked on, but simply worship him for what he did.  I see how, if those really are the steps he walked on, that could be a really cool and amazing thing, but I don't believe that they have healing or forgiving powers, for they are in fact, simple steps of marble.

I chugged a gatorade and ate some pringles, and we were on our way again.  We saw more things than I could explain here.

It was, in fact, 12 miles.

We ate lunch at the British Embassy, and then continued.  By the end of the day, my feet were covered in blisters and I was pretty much ready to crash and/or die.

When we returned home, I showered, my sweet mama rubbed my feet, and we gathered around the laptop for some good old Friday Night Lights.  That's some good stuff right thar.

Monday, we went to Italian class and I did schoolwork.

Today was another walk!  This one was far more casual, though.  We went by the Circus Maximus, several Piazzas, and the Jewish quarter (which was my favorite part.)  It wasn't as long, and it was just the spouses club.  They let me hang with them because I'm really great.

It has nothing to do the fact that they feel sorry for me.  I'm sure of it.

Oh I'm kidding. ;)  It's just because I'm homeschooled and I don't bug 'em too much.

Now, I'm going to go read because I think if I try to walk another step, my calves are going to revolt and tear themselves from my legs, so goodnight, dear readers.

Buona notte!

A Haiku. Just for You.

I'll write a post soon

For now, I do my homework

And rub my poor feet.  

(I walked 12 miles yesterday.  Stand by for a long-winded little post.)

Buona Mattina, e nel caso io non ti vedo, buona pomeriggio, buona sera, e buona notte.

If you can guess what (or at least movie of origin) that quote is up thar that I put into Italian, you get a gold star.  No seriously.  A gold star.  Just. for. you.

(And if my quote has Italian grammatical errors, don't be surprised.)

(I'm only human)

(Nothing but a little girl.)

(Just a wee lass.)

(And google translate can be rather poop-y.)

The Love I've Been Given

The lights have gone down in my room
Enclosing my soul is the fear of my doom.

I can't see your face like I need to
All the sins in my heart seep right through.

The tears down my cheek are burning
And all I can know is of yearning.

It's so very clear that I need you,
So why is it that I can't hear you?

I open the book and pore over the pages,
My soul and my heart break free from their cages!

A light turns on that some can not see,
So why, oh god, did you choose me?

I'm broken, unworthy, and constantly failing,
Not walking right beside you, I feel I'm only trailing.

Yet you waited down the path and held out your hand,
In the midst of this sinning, dry, weary land.

My heart begins to sing a new song
As you continue to love me like you have all along.

I've never seen it so clearly before,
And now I simply can see nothing more.

My cry is now only the tears of my gladness,
I can't even remember where I left all my sadness!

I may stumble, I'll still fall, but I have been forgive.
You wait for me still, oh the grace I've been given!

You've cast out my demons and taken my heart,
You've washed it and tamed it, you gave it a part.

You gave it a part in your magnificent story,
And soon, very soon, you'll take me to glory.

Espresso, homeschool, and music, oh my!

Hey.

So it's been a while.

I'm just surprised I didn't get emails from friends asking me if I died!  (It happens.)

I just felt the need to step away for a couple days.  My real, legit school started this week, and Mama and I have been hitting the NATO college for a lot of events and lectures, Italian classes, and the like quite a bit lately.  It's pretty busy around here!

Yesterday, while my mom was at a spouses' coffee in the bar at the college (Read: bar in Italy is not like bar in America, fyi.  It's coffee.  Cafe.  Think Starbucks, but cheaper.  Way, way, way cheaper.) I went to the gym.  Ran the treadmill, lifted, used some of the machines, and did push-ups and lunges.  I then proceeded to feel like jell-o for a couple of hours.

I cooled off and changed into nice clothes. (the "man" won't let you wear gym/casual clothes in the college, though honestly, I don't really even know who the "man" actually is when it comes to the college.  But I digress.  I digress quite often.)  I tip-toed over to the library where it was cool.

If you were wondering why I tip-toed, it's because my ridiculously cute gladiator sandals (not a tourist schtick. They really are "in" here.) are apparently equally ridiculously squeaky on the floor in the college.  I might as well have been wearing a cowbell.

I read some schoolbooks, and then squeaked over to the bar.  (Read:  NOT AN ACTUAL BAR.)  I went up to the barista, and said "Un espresso, per favore."  I figured I'd just knock one back before continuing to work on my reading.  I get by with a little help from my caffeine.  She pointed over to where the spouses (spice? speese?) were sitting, and asked:  'Are you, er, with-a the spouse?'

'No, but my mom is.  I'm here waiting for her.'

'Oh, ok.  I make-a you one, moment, please.'  (I just love the way Italians speak English.)

She brought me my drink, wrinkled her brow, and said rather shyly, 'Er, may I ask-a... how old are you?"

I decided to use my Italian to make her more comfortable, and said "Sono sedici anni."  (Sedici being 16.)

"Oh ok, I was thinking you were, er, older!"  This is probably because she's seen me with the spouses (Spice?  Speeseee??)  because I take Italian with them and I am going to be attending Art and History lectures with them.  She smiled at me and said, 'You are very nice!'  and waved away my .50 euro.  I thanked her, she attended the next customer, I drank my (free!!) life-blood, and headed back to the library to wait for my mama.

I finished all of my reading for that day, and so I read my Kindle.  Mama got there, and we waited with a friend while our other friend who was going to drive us home got a tour around the college.

We came home, I had lunch, and at 5 pm I had my first real Rhetoric II online class, which was fun!  I'm really excited about that.  Today, in about an hour and 15 minutes, I have my first real Geometry online class!  I'm... relatively excited!  I mean, as excited as a bookworm like me could be about a math class.  But my teacher and the other kids are sweet.  But I'm pretty sure I'm the oldest one in the class, because I did pre-algebra, algebra I, and algebra II before geometry.

I think it'll be a good school year.  I feel it in my bones.

Or perhaps that's the copious amount of caffeine currently shooting through my bloodstream.  Could be.

Anyway, I'm also on a music kick right now.  I mean, it's not like I ever didn't enjoy it, but for some reason I can't take my headphones out of my ears right now.  It's actually my dad's iPod, because mine decided it doesn't like me anymore.

I understand.  I loved it... to its demise.  I think it's salvageable, but I don't really want too work on it right now.

Right now, I'm listening to Fernando Ortega.  I like his music because I've never been good at memorizing scripture, but he writes beautiful music and then sings exact scripture for the lyrics, so I can memorize it better that way.  Not to mention, it's entirely soothing and gorgeous.

I also like Foreigner.  Go figure.

I never was normal, you know, and I never claimed to be.

I do not take my country music lightly

Yes, it is in fact my second YouTube video of the day.

I have reasons, though!  You see, my life the past two days hasn't been really anything to write home about.  I've had my orientations for my online classes, done some homework, and learned about some cool stuff I get to do this year sight-seeing wise, because my dad's work is offering tours of some really neat places on the weekends. But I don't want to spoil all my future blogging by telling you about it now!

I wanted to share, though, this powerful video.  It's Carrie Underwood at the CMA's performing "Jesus Take the Wheel."  That may sound ordinary, but it's not.  At the end of the song, she transformed it into a big, powerful singing of the hymn "How Great Thou Art."  It gave me goosebumps.

I'm frustrated with ABC, because on television, they cut out the hymn part and cut to a video of "A day in the life of Taylor Swift."  Now, I love me some Taylor, but I find it absolutely infuriating that they cut out a hymn.  Anyone have a guess as to why?

Now watch!



Sound off in the comments:  What do you think about ABC's choice to cut the hymn?

And also, um, Carrie Underwood?  Girl's got pipes.

The ibex is me. I am the ibex.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.  Because you see?  The ibex is me when woken up before I'm good and ready.




This video got me very tickled.

WAAAUUGHHHHHH, to you and yours.

Call me Sneller. Tory Sneller.

*DISCLAIMER:  I am not responsible for any tears of boredom, sleepy eyes, and inactive brain cells that may or may not follow the reading of this post.  Side effects of reading this post may include frustration, confusion, annoyance, headaches, nausea, and serious illness/and or death.*

Today, I shall write a list.  No, not coherent paragraphs, just a list.

1.  I'm writing a list because I have serious writer's block.

2.  I have writer's block because I've been typing non-stop at a self-imposed project I'm working on, and it's sucking the story-teller out of me.  In fact, it's sucking the very brain out of me because I almost just typed 'tory-sneller" instead of story-teller.

3.  Sadly, that is not a joke.

4.  Yesterday was not a very busy day, which was nice.  It was my last official day of summer, I think!  Today I have my first orientation for an online class.

5.  I'm very excited.  I have decorated organized the majority of my binders.  One to go.

6.  I just made some espresso.  I think I could sure use it, don't you?

7.  I stayed up really late last night.  REALLY late.  I was working on my project.

8   Because of number 7, I slept in till 11 today. Mom said she did a bunch of stuff in my room, opened my shade (which opens very loudly), hung clothes on my balcony, and did laundry in the laundry room adjacent to my room and I never. moved.

9.  That's awesome.

10.  Wish I could give you a number 10, but... I'm not that interesting.

Good-bye for now!