She was the first to guess that no, I have never crashed a golf cart, because that would be incredibly difficult. And also, she guessed I have not had two eye surgeries, because in reality, and get ready for some shock....
I've had three. Long story short, I had a lazy eye that would just sort of wander around (I was very young) and they couldn't fix it. The first two times flopped, but the third time stuck (pun completely intended.) I now have near-perfect vision. My last eye doctor was shocked, and I'm just happy I don't have to look like this anymore:
|At least I knew how to accessorize.|
My eyes were "fixed" then, but my vision was still bad. Somehow, though, it just sort of healed itself in the past few years, and my far vision is 20/20.
Oh yeah, and I still sleep quite a bit, too. They haven't been able to fix that.
And my hair? I wanted to look like Velma from Scooby Doo. I think I succeeded. (Mom, why'd you let me do that to my hair??)
And without further ado, here is the (goofy) poem for Josie!
Pretty as posies,
With flaxen hair,
And quite a flair.
You're not a dope
About your cheetah-print jacket
You made quite a racket.
I want one.
Please don't mope
Even though this poem is strange
Even though most find me deranged
Congrats, you won!
You picked out the lies
And this poem's the prize
Pretty as posies
You won, you won
And now I'm done
Bye, y'all, and have a nice day!